Drugs are bad....part two. The update.

So a while ago I wrote a post about the struggles my cousin (Tilly) was going through fighting an ice addiction. You can read it here.

I have not had a great deal of contact with her over the past 6 months, the occassional call or sms maybe. I guess she had a lot on her plate what with going to counselling and getting her life together and I have had my hands full with day to day life as well.

I saw Tilly for the first time since Christmas time over the weekend. My cousin Courtney had a bit of a get together on Saturday night for all my cousins to catch up and Tilly flew down from QLD for it.

Firstly it was great to see her, she looked healthy, happy and bubbly like she used to. She had completed the program she was in, she was working part time, she had made a few friends through work and was able to have a bit of a life. She also announced that she was coming back to Sydney to live at her dads house in a few weeks. I am really proud of the recovery she has made so far and hope that she continues on this path.

There are a couple of things that worry me about her moving back though. She will be living at her dads, which is kinda a good thing, but her dad is prety much an alcoholic. He spends half his life at the pub. Not the best person to be keeping an eye on her. But on the same hand, he is her dad and should be there for her. Perhaps he has cleaned himself up a bit? Lets hope so.

She told me on her way from the airport to my cousins house she drove past her exes house. Which is not exactly on the way, she must have made a bit of a detour. I mean, I know she didnt drop by to say hi, he has moved on and is in another relationship now and things between Tilly and the ex are not exactly on speaking terms as there is a court case pending (not going to get into that one - but it certainly wouldn't be a civil converstion between the two). But I ask myself - why would she drive past? To me, it sounds like she perhaps isn't quite over him or the life they had together and perhaps living back in Sydney could escalate that situation. Hmmm... maybe, I don't know. It seems a little strange to me.

The last thing that worries me, is she seems so co-dependent. I only saw her for a few hours, but she has definately changed. She is clingy to the point she has to be holding everyones hand or arm when she speaks to them, speaking really close (I hate close speakers) and follows everyone around like a child. The way she speaks about coming back to live in Sydney is a bit funny too. She seems to think that all our friends are going to be dropping everything to help her and keep her occupied (ok, that was a little harsh, but you get what I mean). She needs to realise that we all have our own partners, jobs, families etc. Not that I don't want to keep an eye out on her, but I have a lot going in my own life and I can't be there for her every second.

I don't want to sound like a bitch, but she has gotten through the hardest part with the support of her family and this is the part that she has to pull herself through. Nobody can do this part for her. She is going to be back at home with all the old temptations. She is going to be close by to the ex and all of their friends who were part of that world and she needs to have the will power to avoid them. I hope that she does because someone cannot be her babysitter every minute of every day.

Hopefully, all this worry will be for nothing.